GDP and GNP

Though I often heard them in TV, newspaper and daily talk, I do not know what they actually mean until I did a little search in answers.com.

GDP: Gross Domestic Product, the total market value of all the goods and services produced within the borders of a nation during a specified period.

GDP = consumption + investment + exports − imports

It is one of the measures of national income and output. It may be used as one indicator of the standard of living in a country, but there may be limitations with this view.

GNP: Gross National Product, the total value of final goods and services produced in a year by a country's nationals (including profits from capital held abroad).

GNP = GDP + income earned by domestic residents through foreign investments - the income earned by foreign investors in the domestic market.

Since World War II, GNP has been generally regarded as the most important indicator of the status of an economy.

It is important to differentiate Gross Domestic Product from Gross National Product (GNP). GDP includes only goods and services produced within the geographic boundaries of the U.S., regardless of the producer's nationality. GNP doesn't include goods and services produced by foreign producers, but does include goods and services produced by U.S. firms operating in foreign countries.

Is Hell exothermic (gives off heat) or endothermic (absorbs heat)?

The following is supposedly an actual question given on a University of Washington chemistry mid-term. The answer by one student was so "profound" that the professor shared it with colleagues, via the Internet, which is, of course, why we now have the pleasure of enjoying it as well.

Bonus Question: Is Hell exothermic (gives off heat) or endothermic (absorbs heat)?

Most of the students wrote proofs of their beliefs using Boyle's law: (gas cools when it expands and heats when it is compressed) or some variant.

One student, however, wrote the following:

First, we need to know how the mass of Hell is changing in time. So, we need to know the rate at which souls are moving into Hell and the rate at which they are leaving. I think that we can safely assume that once a soul gets to Hell, it will not leave. Therefore, no souls are leaving.

As for how many souls are entering Hell, let's look at the different Religions that exist in the world today. Most of these religions state that if you are not a member of their religion, you will go to Hell. Since there is more than one of these religions and since people do not belong to more than one religion, we can project that all souls go to Hell.

With birth and death rates as they are, we can expect the number of souls in Hell to increase exponentially. Now, we look at the rate of change of the volume in Hell because Boyle's Law states that in order for the temperature and pressure in Hell to stay the same, the volume of Hell has to expand proportionately as souls are added. This gives two possibilities:

1. If Hell is expanding at a slower rate than the rate at which souls enter Hell, then the temperature and pressure in Hell will increase until, as the saying goes, all Hell breaks loose.

2. If Hell is expanding at a rate faster than the increase of souls in Hell, then the temperature and pressure will drop until, - - Hell freezes over.

So which is it? If we accept the postulate given to me by Teresa during my Freshman year that, "it will be a cold day in Hell before I sleep with you, and take into account the fact that I slept with her last night, then number 2 must be true, and thus I am sure that Hell is exothermic and has already frozen over. The corollary of this theory is that since Hell has frozen over, it follows that it is not accepting any more souls and is therefore, extinct...leaving only Heaven -- thereby proving the existence of a divine being which explains why, last night, Teresa kept shouting "Oh my God."

THIS STUDENT RECEIVED THE ONLY "A".

Comment on its scientific argument: He assumes that the hell has a positive heat capacity, which means the hell will gives off heat when its temperature drops. But his premises, that every soul goes to hell and no soul leaves it, let me think of black hole, a celestial body which engulfs everything near it. And black hole has a negative heat capacity, which means it will gives out heat when it temperature increases. Therefore, if his premises are all valid, and given that the hell also has a negative heat capacity like black hole, the hell is endothermic.

Comment on its propriety in Chinese culture as a joke: It will inevitably be considered improper as an answer on a mid-term test in major universities in China. But if we consider the attitude of sex portrayed in the movie, American Pie, it might be proper in US.

My personality profile

Overview
Some of the following information may seem inaccurate or incomplete. Remember, that this profile is a snapshot of your personality at a specific moment. It is not intended as an in-depth analysis of your complete being, but as a tool to aid in self-discovery:

• You have a strong feeling of optimism, considered favorably by most people around you. Your perception is that the bottle is half-full rather than half-empty.
• You have a strong sense of humor. You usually know when to lighten a difficult situation, amuse and entertain people.
• You have to be with people. This extends into the need to gain popularity, achieve social recognition and influence those people around you. The "bottom-line" is a strong people orientation.

Communication
The following statements offer a look at the natural behavior you bring to an interpersonal relationship.

• You have a natural, outgoing style that some have labeled as the "natural salesperson." You are generally likable, talkative and socially assertive. Your primary intent is convincing or persuading people.
• You can generate enthusiasm in yourself and in other people. Your enthusiasm, often contagious, involves many people in a social activity who might not ordinarily become involved.
• You show sympathy to the feelings and needs of others. Your natural empathy style may draw others to you.
• One of your great strengths is your ability to communicate and talk readily. Since all strengths may be overused at times, you may sometimes talk too much.

Improving communication,
Below is a list of communication styles that will mesh well with your own:

• Share specific ideas to carry out an action.
• Be brief, clear and to the point.
• Motivate and persuade by referring to objectives and RESULTS.
• Provide options, rather than opinions.
• Plan sufficient time to talk and listen.
• Talk about expectations.
• Support results, not the person, if you agree.
• Ask for opinions and ideas.
• Be ready at the exact time.
• Plan interactions which support dreams and goals.
• Provide questions and choices for making decisions.
• Be stimulating, fun-loving, and fast-moving.

Strength
Following are some of the specific strengths and/or personal characteristics that you bring to a relationship. These may form the foundations of many of your friendships and dealings with other people.

• You are usually enthusiastic about activities and planning.
• You enjoy situations where you can demonstrate your skill or mastery of a subject.
• You are optimistic and tend to make others feel good about themselves.
• You generally don't like to back away from a challenge.
• You like to analyze problems and discuss their possible solutions before taking action.
• You are socially poised and people-oriented.
• You have an excellent sense of humor and tend to see humor in events spontaneously.
• You tend to enjoy life and share that enjoyment with others.
• You tend to be influential in decision-making situations. Others often turn to you for advice.
• You like to initiate new activities.

Needs
While answering the Relationship Questionnaire you established a pattern of basic, subconscious wants. This section of the report was produced by analyzing those patterns. Our wants change as we mature and obtain our life goals. You may find it valuable to revisit this section periodically to see how your wants have changed. You may want:

• Support of your ideas and dreams.
• Equal relations with others.
• Others to adhere to your high standards.
• Popularity.
• Acceptance in a variety of groups.
• Time to adjust to change.
• Recognition of skills and ability.
• Social recognition of your accomplishments.
• A support system to help you get things done.
• Reassurance.
• A friendly, favorable social environment.
• Better planning for change in the future.

I did this personality test in eharmony, an professional online dating service site. I am surprised by my patience to complete such a long questionnaire.

FACES Beijing: English Sayings

No hurt, no foul.
Red sky at night, sailors' delight; red sky in the morning, sailors take warning.
Beer before liquor, never be sicker; liquor before beer, and clear.

I did a little research on the last saying. It's intersting to see there are so many versions of it.

Beer before liquor, never sicker, liquor before beer, in the clear.
Beer before liquor, get drunk quicker, liquor before beer, shed a tear.
Liquor before beer, in the clear, beer before liquor, even sicker.
Beer before liquor, never sicker, liquor before beer, have no fear.
Beer before Wine, makes you feel fine, Wine before Beer, makes you feel queer.

Here is a tip from Wikihow: how to prevent hangover.
While you shouldn't mix types of alcohol, if you do, always drink the hardest type at the start of the night, and the weakest at the end. Remember this rhyme to help: "Beer before liquor, never been sicker. Liquor before beer, you're in the clear."

FACES beijing: competitors and collaborators

FACES is about China-US relations. It is the underlying center topic in all seminars, speeches and talks. And even though I do not fully understand about the details (sometimes a single word) of any topic, I identify one common assumption in all the events. And this finding not only reshapes my view of China-US relations, but also the human relations in general.

Before FACES, I generally agreed with the statement that every nation cares about their own interest. And because of the limited space and resources, all nations are ultimately competitors. But in Trade Session, almost every speaker talks about the interdependence of China and US in economy; in Diplomacy Session, almost every speaker talks about the cooperation between China-US in solving regional and global crises; in Research Session, almost every speaker talks about the collaborations between China-US in scientific researches on space, life science and materials. All of these bring out the final underlying assumption: nations have common interests. The common interests will not become clear if one only see problems from the perspective of one country. But they might become obvious when one view problems in a GLOBAL perspective. 'Global' is not a big hollow word. It means that one nation consumes products and services of other nations; it means that the bankrupt of one nation's economy will affect other nations'; it means that the pollution of one nation will affect other nations as well; it also means that the unrest of one nation will make many nations unsafe. The interdependence among nations calls for the collaboration. Therefore, though they might be ultimately competitors, they will also be collaborators all along the way.

If we also see a person as an entity of interests, it is easy to extend this argument of nations to personal level through an analogy (though might be a false analogy). Nations have interests and common interests; so do individuals. If one only sees things from his own perspective, he tends to compete against every one and easily become narrow-minded. Seeing things from other's perspective and identify the common interests are the equivalent of the GLOBAL view in personal level.

FACES beijing: Ronnie Chen

During the FACES Beijing conference this November, Ronnie Chan, a successful business man (in terms of money), gave a speech on "Americanism vs. Chineseness: Differences and Similarities and How They Affect US-China Relations Today". His speech covers a huge range of topics, such as how Chinese and English language affect people's thinking pattern, medicine, and literature. He talks about why an ABC girl fails in business bidding in China because of her aggressiveness and assertiveness, which are very common in people doing business in US. He talks about why the leadership in China is described as "benevolent dictatorship". He also talks about the corruption in China. In a word, in his speech, I was totally astonished at his amount of knowledge and experience.

The confrontation arises when American delegates question about his classification of Japanese people as amoral people in the Q&A section. In his speech, Ronnie Chen classifies Chinese and American as moral people, and Japanese people as amoral. The base for his argument is that the Japanese deny their outrageous crime in World War 2. Chen questions that what you are going to with a person who just killed 40 people yesterday and ask who they are today. At that moment, I liked his statement very much. But I changed my mind abruptly soon when some delegates argue later that every nation did silly things in the past. Chinese and American both did. So why did Chen use a double standards. And I was ashamed that I did not discover this obvious fallacy in Chen's argument.

Though I do not remember clearly how this argument ends, I learn one thing from it. It's hard for me to keep rational when intense emotion is aroused. Under intense emotion, I am more likely to fail to identify what is opinion and what is fact, what are reasonable and what are irrational. Being completely rational is impossible, but identifying beforehand what my "hot spots" in emotion are will make easy coping with situations like that.

Quotes about "winning is not everything"

Playing ball is just like life. Winning is not everything. When you face the challenge, you need to have the courage to stand up and shout out: It's my turn! I'll play.

"Winning is not everything, it is the only thing!"Green Bay Packer coach Vincent Limbardi.

Winning is not everything, but the effort to win is.

For GRE

I took the GRE test last Saturday. I feel that I should write something about it, after all, it's an important test and also a tough one.

Here comes the post about the beautiful sentences with GRE words.

“I just look up at the stars and let the vastness of that black and twinkling canopy fill my soul”(Margaret Mason)

“the smug look of a toad breakfasting on fat marsh flies”(William Pearson)

“Culture is then properly described not as having its origin in curiosity, but as having its origin in the love of perfection” (Matthew Arnold). (culture: denote a personal quality resulting from the development of intellect, manners, and aesthetic appreciation. )

“an ambitious, disingenuous, philistine, and hypocritical operator, who . . . exemplified . . . the most disagreeable traits of his time”(David Cannadine)

“Obedience,/Bane of all genius, virtue, freedom, truth,/Makes slaves of men”(Percy Bysshe Shelley)

“Your true lover of literature is never fastidious” (Robert Southey).

“the weapon which most readily conquers reason: terror and violence” (Adolf Hitler).

“Fear is the parent of cruelty” (J.A. Froude)

“We should not pretend to understand the world only by the intellect; we apprehend it just as much by feeling” (Carl Jung).

“On a summer night . . . a mantle of dust hangs over the gravel roads”(John Dollard)

“He meandered to and fro . . . observing the manners and customs of Hillport society” (Arnold Bennett).

Their infatuation blinded them to the fundamental differences in their points of view.

“The natural bent of my mind was to science”(Thomas Paine)

“Commonly, though not always, we exhort to good actions, we instigate to ill” (Samuel Johnson). (we are exhorted to good actions. Use passive voice?)

“No one could soar into a more intricate labyrinth of refined phraseology” (Anthony Trollope).

“I know and feel what an irksome task the writing of long letters is” (Edmund Burke).

“Russia's final hour, it seemed, approached with inexorable certainty” (W. Bruce Lincoln).

“Most Ivy League freshman classes are chosen from a motley collection of constituencies . . . and a bare majority of entering students can honestly be called scholars”(New York Times)

He stared down at his dinner plate in a morose and unsociable manner.

made a fetish of punctuality

“Every great hostelry flaunted the flag of some foreign potentate” (John Dos Passos)

“Hide me from Day's garish eye”(John Milton)

“Sometimes goldfinches one by one will drop/From low-hung branches . . . /Then off at once, as in a wanton freak” (John Keats).

“For nimble thought can jump both sea and land” (Shakespeare).

At the time, I was too obtuse to grasp the true implications of her behavior.

“Over grass bleached colorless by strong outback sun, the herd oozes forward”(Geraldine Brooks)

“opaque, elusive, minimal meanings”(John Simon)

He stared down at his dinner plate in a morose and unsociable manner.

a morass of detail

“That night he dreamed he was traveling in a foreign country, only it seemed to be a medley of all the countries he'd ever been to and even some he hadn't”(Anne Tyler)

“He is pretty well advanced in years, but hale, robust, and florid” (Tobias Smollett)

“There was nothing feverish or hectic about his vigor”(Erik Erikson)

the young Mozart's prodigious talents

“Miracles are propitious accidents, the natural causes of which are too complicated to be readily understood” (George Santayana).

“Every man had his own quirks and twists” (Harriet Beecher Stowe)

“Keen, poignant agonies seemed to shoot from his neck downward”(Ambrose Bierce)

"Poignant grief cannot endure forever" (W.H. Hudson).

Practice [Example] is better than precept.

“Werner finds himself suddenly in a most awkward predicament” (Thomas Carlyle)

Even a written apology failed to placate the indignant hostess.

ponderous prehistoric beasts

“It would be preposterous to take so grave a step on the advice of an enemy” (J.A. Froude)

the mire of poverty

“The path was altogether indiscernible in the murky darkness which surrounded them” (Sir Walter Scott).

“the narrow crevice of one good deed in a murky life of guilt” (Charles Dickens).

The freighter moored alongside the wharf.

“No idea is so antiquated that it was not once modern. No idea is so modern that it will not someday be antiquated” (Ellen Glasgow).

isn't it?

Time is limited, isn't it?

Work is rotated, isn't it?

Future is dynamic, isn't it?

Life is fantastic, isn't it?

Choice

Oracle: I told you before. No one can see beyond a choice they don't understand, and I mean no one.
--Matrix, Revolution

Though the choice seems obvious for me, I experienced a certain extent of confusion when facing big decision in life: to work or to pursue a higher degree. The underlying question of this choice seems to be what I am going to do in the future, what my life goal is, because this decision will undoubtedly affect my life in future. However, I found that my decision is based mostly, not on the vision of the future, which is inherently vague and indefinite for me, but on what I have done in the past. Since every graduate or professional program asks the candidates what preparation of knowledge and skill they have in that specific area, it also seems to be practical and reasonable to do things as if we are laying the bricks, one based another, never awry. But isn't it a bit monotonous?

Where is the change? Where is the turn? Where is the jump? But before answering those questions, answer these questions first: what to change? Where to turn? Where to jump? Ironically, I am back on the original point of the old-friend-like question, which is asked again and again since primary school: what do I want to do? What I have done and what I will do seem to like the questions of which is the first: egg or chicken? The truth, I think, may be that one will never make a decision with absolutely full confidence of its consequences.

Everyone travels with a certain degree of confusion of the destiny. And so do I.

one friend's signature

One should never increase, beyond what is necessary, the number of entities required to explain anything.

It's an interesting sentence provoking philosophical thought. Before analyzing this claim, I would like to limit "anything" to "things met in ordinary daily life", which exludes any scientific, political or social issues. Things like that will spoil the pure philosophical query here

Understandably, everyone need "some entities" to explain the world and himself or herself if one remain conscious. It's also a great thing that everything is able to be explained by a handful of "entities", and guide the action accordingly when one faces complicated siuations. Imagine that there are principles of life that guide the life just as there are three Newton's laws of mechanism that predict the motion an object. Isn't it a great triumph of human intellect?

It might grow to be an infinite list, but several most important entities that used to explain the motivation of human action includes: (from How to Win Friends and Influence People)

1. Health and preservation of life.
2. Food
3. Sleep
4. Money and the things money will buy
5. Life in the hereafter
6. Sexual gratification
7. The well-being of our children
8. The feeling of importance

If one does not want to be exhaustive about his/her list, the above mentioned entities are well-enough in explaining every day's action. One can experience limited situation compared with the sum of all human beings'. Therefore, one does not necessarily to be exhaustive in making his/her own list. Perhaps that's why the author put a constraint: "beyond what is necessary".

the use of paranormal pursuits

Admittedly, these non-mainstream areas of inquiry address certain human needs, which mainstream science and other areas of intellectural inquiry inherently cannot. One such needs involves our common experience as human that we freely make our own choices and decisions in life and therefore carry some responsibilities for their consquences. Faced with infinite choices, we experience uncertainty, insecurity, and confusion; and we feel remorse, regret, and guilt when in retrospect our choices turn out to be poor ones. Understandably, to prevent these bad feelings many people try to shift the burden of making difficult choices and decisions to some nebulous authority outside themselves--by relying on the stars or on a stack of tarot cards for guidance.

Above is a paragraph in the GRE analytical writing preparation book. I like this paragraph particularly because of its keen perception and revelation of human trait in the course of argument, which reminds me of the following paragraph:

We continue to share with our remotest ancestors the most tangled and evasive attitudes about death, despite the great distance we have come in understanding some of the profound aspects of biology. We have as much distaste for talking about personal death as for thinking about it; it is an indelicacy, like talking in mixed company about venereal disease or abortion in the old days. Death on a grand scale does not bother us in the same special way: we can sit around a dinner table and discuss war, involving 60 billion volatilized human deaths, as though we were talking about bad weather; we can watch abrupt bloody death every day, in color, on films and television, without blinking back a tear. It is when the numbers of dead are very small, and very close, that we begin to think in scurrying circles. At the very center of the problem is the naked cold deadness of one’s own self, the only reality in nature of which we can have absolute certainty, and it is unmentionable, unthinkable. We may be even less willing to face the issue at first hand than our predecessors because of a secret new hope that maybe it will go away. We like to think, hiding the thought, that with all the marvelous ways in which we seem now to lead nature around by the nose, perhaps we can avoid the central problem if we just become, next year, say, a bit smarter.

the beginning of a new season

The top five football leagues in Europe has been opening their new season one by one. For me, today marks the beginning of a new season, a season that is full with exams and tests. I had the GRE writing test this morning.

I had so many tests before, but this one is of particular importance, because I believed in this exam I reached such a stage of mindset that enables me to "journey through" tests.

What I wish for all students is some release from the clammy grip of the future. I wish them a chance to savor each segment of their education as an experience in itself and not as a grim preparation for the next step. I wish them the right to experiment, to trip and fall, to learn that defeat is as instructive as victory and is not the end of the world.

I don't know who wrote these words, but I'd like to keep them as a reminder that the process is all the important, and that being defeated does not necessarily mean imperfection.

In fact, everything can be perfect. The trick is how you define "perfect".

Communication

"You can speak the same language, but still fail to communicate."

In a Personal Statement workshop in Nanjing University last Thursday, MCK, an American and my group member of When Pigs Fly, translate "stereotype" to "成见" and "偏见", and then talks in Chinese about the stereoypes of Chinese students in US graduate schools. The audience get confused when he refer both strength and weakness of Chinese students to US gradute school's "成见". The difference between stereotype and 成见 is subtle; the later has negative connotations while the former does not.

Not only would misuse of specific word cause failure of communication, but also the unawared disagreement of the definition of word. In a E-mail to MCK, I talk about the "design" of When Pigs Fly website, which in my mind means the CSS design, a computer programming language. But I fails to mention it explicitly. MCK get confused, because what he perceive design is the layout of contents displayed in the browser.

Enlightened by my first expeirence, I try a different strategy when explaining the structure of the website to Matt, another group member who does not know anything about the web technology. "The webiste is like a building. The domain of the website is like the name of the building. The domain are listed on the signposts of internet, the DNS, which guides the browser requesting specific pages to the website server. The website server is like the land the building stands. The webpages are the actual building, which you can modify, decorate and reconstruct by rewriting the page codes." I feel satisfied when he understands what I mean after my explanation.

Knowledge and Wisdom by Bertrand Russell

Most people would agree that, although our age far surpasses all previous ages in knowledge, there has been no correlative increase in wisdom. But agreement ceases as soon as we attempt to define 'wisdom' and consider means of promoting it.

...
There are, I think, several factors that contribute to wisdom. Of these I should put first a sense of proportion: the capacity to take account of all the important factors in a problem and to attach to each its due weight.

...
There must be, also, a certain awereness of the ends of human life...Perhaps one could stretch the comprehensiveness that constitute wisdom to include not only intellect but also feeling. It is by no means uncommon to find men whose knowledge is wide but whose feelings are narrow...

It is not only in public life ways, but in private life equally, that wisdom is needed. It is needed in the choice of ends to be persued and in emancipation from personal prejudice.

....
I think the essence of wisdom is emancipation, as far as possible, from the tyranny of the here and now.

...
...Hatred of evil is itself a kind of bondage to evil...

A sense of proportion, a certain awareness of the ends of human life and emancipation. Intellect and feeling.

We need a scale to determine the weight of each factor in a problem--the sense of proportion. This scale varies from person to person and from culture to culture. Consider physical beauty: some like big eyes, some like high nose and some like oval face. And the aesthetic standard differs greatly between cultures and even between ages.

The phrase 'ends of life' is confusing; does it mean the purpose of life or the termination of life? The context does not provide a clue, and it seems the two meanings both make sense in the context. Or maybe Russell use the word 'end' to express the both. Everyone exists for a purpose. If he does not have one or does not find one, he does not live. "Everyone dies, but not everyone lives."

Emancipation is desperately needed in China. Most people judge propriety of their deeds according to solely what others think, especially what their master think.

the power of belief

Seraph: "Did you always know?"
Oracle: "Oh, no... No, I didn't. But I believed...I believed."

This is the last scence in Matrix Revolution: the Oracle sits on a bench besides a lake in the dawn, and Seraph comes towards her. The oracle does not know that Zion is going to be saved and the war between machine and the human is going to end before Neo achieves it. As she reiterates at last, she "believed". That belief not only gives power and strength to herself but also Neo, Trinity, Morpheus and on and on and on. In a sense, it is this belief that makes the peace happen.

I talked with one friend a few days ago about goals of life. One of her goal is to have a daughter in the year of rabbit. I am curious about it and ask why. She said old men believe persons born in pig year and rabbit year will have particularly good relationship and she is in the year of pig.

I would have regarded it as superstition and haven't bothered to give a slightest thought to it, if I heard such a claim one year before. But now, I not only find it interesting, but also "reasonable". If the mother and the daughter both believe that persons in pig year and rebbit year will have good relationship, they will feel closer to each other not only because they are mum and daughter, but also because they born in the years of special connection. And if this belief goes into the unconscious level, the influence may be greater.

Free the mind

"oki, oki, free my mind, free my mind" Neo mumbles repeatedly before he makes his first jump between buildings in the film Matrix, my favorite.

I had a free conversation yesterday with an eighty-two-year-old man, who is the husband of my grandfather's sister and an old expert on education. I asked him the question of efficient schedule, or more precisely, how to manage time. "Free your mind!", he urges. Do not be confined by any form, such as a timetable or a pre-designed schedule, he adds. When I speak confidently about my arrangement that I swim once a week and play football once week, he said "open your mind. Play football whenever you want and swim as many times as you want."

Though his view may be a little like self-indulgence, the most important point he made and the most enlightening point to me is that do not set boundary to oneself, especially in the form of a strict time schedule. Doing what one really wants to do is the key to efficiency.

The decision to postpone the GRE test

One the one side, if I take the GRE test this June, there will be less than one month preparation time, which is the worst thing because I am not even familiar with those GRE words. So I will have to spend nearly all the time from now to do the memory work and honing the specific test taking skills. And consequently I will drop a handful of other stuffs including my school work which is now approaching the finals, my laboratory work, which just runs on the right track, and the When Pigs Fly website construction that I am in charge of.

On the other side, if I take the GRE test in October, I will get quite busy this fall: I have six compulsory modules; I have GRE subject test in November; I have laboratory work; I have graduate school application to ponder about; and I have the FACES meeting to attend and FACES collaborative project to participate.

I step back, looking for a decisive weight to be added on one side of the miserable balance. And I finally found it; it's hope. There is a chance that by arranging my schedule properly, I will get so many things done in time.

....

...

It was one o'clock in the morning. Lying on bed and listening every sound night has produce, I couldn't sleep. I ought to feel comfortable; the decision I just make release me temporarily from a huge burden. In retrospect, I found that the feeling of depression is a result of reluctance to give up. In a sense, my decision to postpone the GRE test is to give up the test. I had same kind of feeling in high school when I gave up the physics Olympiad and biology Olympiad in order to focus on the chemistry one. That was also a hard decision, which later proved to be very successful.

what my life is now

One of my new friend met on FACES emailed me, ask me what kind of life I had in China. I think about what my life is like, but never write them down. She gives me a chance to take a careful look at my current life. Two words to describe it are busy and enjoyable.

It's a busy one: I have school work, lab work, and I also participate in FACES collaborative project and prepare for GRE on June.

It's also an enjoyable one. I like science and I like my current major, chemistry. The lab work is fascinating because I feel more like a scientist even though I have just started reading papers. Collaborative project is exciting; every member talks a lot in the online discussion board and I feel that I am now really going to do some work good to my local community and society. The GRE requires memory work which seems boring, but I have discovered a method to make it more interesting--to look up the unfamiliar word in American Heritage Dictionary to find some interesting sentences. I quote my favorite two sentences here: "The weapon which most readily conquers reason: terror and violence." And "Obedience, /bane of all genius, virtue, freedom, truth, / Makes slaves of men."

long time no post

Nearly one month I have not written anything for my beloved blog! I spend most of this month preparing and enjoying FACES.

What I enjoy most is talking with the delegates and organizers. They are the most passionate, most thoughtful young people I have ever seen.

Lots of funny things happens too. I played Taiji in the rock music party, and I have to move three times faster than usual. To fufill the requirements of a game, Scavenger Hunt, I entered the lady's restroom with other four group members --three of us will definitely not be able enter again--to get a photo of ourselves in mirror. And An old-book store owner roared at me because I am going to take photos in her store. And on the farewell dinner, I gave the worst speech I can ever give, but still someone says he enjoys it and he is not kidding.

Stanford students seems to be busy with their extracurriculum activities all the time. They will be regarded as "Bu Wu Zheng Ye" if they ever do this in Nanda. Two education systems and the corresponding evaluation system are different. Perhaps it is hard to make a fair judgement on them if I am still inside the system.

When an american delegates talks about the ordinary postal mail, he says:"it is so 20th century". I enjoy this accurate judgement particularly for its odd wording. I copy it and say "it's so FACES that people are nice, that organizers keep warning us to be hurry because we are behind the schedule, that there are so few people majoring science and engineering, and that it is not so sad to say goodbye because the planned re-union on November in Beijing."